DATING DIARY TWO + Freedom Fry

Posted on May 12, 2013 by ohDearyme

Ok Dating Diary… guy number twoooooo…

Ok, so this guy I met at a music event. We both got talking about our video camera’s…(yeah I film.. you film? Oh that’s really interesting…yep. That kinda chat). We swapped numbers and talked about linking up for coffee to chat about collaborating. I honestly naively thought that this was what we were actually going to do.

So we met up in a cheap café. And he went on to order near enough half of the menu. Pancakes, sausages and French toast sorted (he literally had three meals in front of him. This guy was hungry!). We began talking about ‘ideas’. But first he was keen to tell me his story. Ok. So an hour and a half later all cards are laid out on the table. It turned out this guy had a prison sentence behind him. A pretty long drawn out lengthy kinda prison sentence. For something thing that he did that wasn’t really that bad (his words). Ok. Well this was a work thing anyway, and we’re only talking ideas so not sure how that might affect me… oh oh… here it comes… ‘so yeah I thought wow this girl is cute…’ and as he put another pancake in his mouth I realised…. THIS ISN’T A WORK THING AT ALL… ‘and I read your blog’…. ‘oh… you read my blog?’… I hesitated.

I started thinking about all the crazy stuff I’d been writing on my blog in recent times. I’ll call that time of my life The Time I Felt So Angry I Wrote A Letter (or Two)  to David Cameron (if you missed what I was writing about I won’t go into it).

‘And er what did you think about it?’ I asked. He looked uncomfortable. I could almost feel him thinking. I started eating his pancakes. I think when I’m nervous I eat. But I’m digressing. He shifted in his seat. I shifted in my seat. Thank god for the pancakes ‘Er… I think some men might think you’re damaged goods’ he shrugged. ‘But I liked you so I wanted to meet you’. Damaged goods. The wind blew the door open. Tumbleweed softly rolled across the cafeteria floor. I looked to my right. An older lady was sitting in the corner looking my way. We locked eyes and she slowly started shaking her head from side to side. (This bit never happened but if it did that would be the spirit of my Nan looking over me and telling me to make a quick sharp exit REBECCA YOU CAN DO BETTER HE HASN’T EVEN BOUGHT YOU A GOD DAMN CUP OF TEA FOR GODS SAKE she would of said. God Bless My Nan).

A tear came to mine eye. But I pushed it back down. He was right though. Some guys might think that. I knew that already. Probably will in fact. He was indeed only being honest.

We said goodbye at the tube… ‘let’s not leave it so long next time’ he smiled. I felt a rush of confused emotion in my stomach. He was a good looking chap. A part of me of course felt flattered. But the words ‘…but I liked you.’ rang through my mind. Was I meant to feel grateful or something? My intuition rang in a red flag alert. I reflected on how amazingly charismatic some men can be.

MUSIC:

I like this by Freedom Fry who are Parisian born Marie Seyrat and Michigan native Bruce Driscoll. Their EP “Friends and Enemies” will be released in the UK on July 29th. It’s true.

Have a good week, Becki Bx

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DATING DIARY + CRYSTAL FIGHTERS DOWNLOAD

Posted on May 9, 2013 by ohDearyme

I’m not really one for talking about my dating escapades. Online. Kinda personal stuff isn’t it? However.. with a few disastrous dates behind me – I’ve been reflecting recently on the kind of men I seem to attract. So I thought I’d do bit of a blog on them. Not all of them at once though. Also. I’ve just watched Girls and to be fair perhaps I need to ditch a bit of this British prudism I seem to be carrying around. Also my mate said it would be funny so here goes.

Let’s talk about MAN NUMBER ONE. In this instant… I’ll call him Louis. Oh Louis..

I met this guy… on NYE. He was (or is cos he’s not dead) a little older than I.. he’d studied at Oxford (sexy no?) and looked just like Louis Theroux (hence the nickname). So after a few smiles and teasing a coffee that would turn into dinner was booked in to the diary. We met up a few times…as friends, but there was an underlying attraction. We met up for coffee one evening…and I’m not really sure what led me to ask this question… but the words just spilled out of my mouth.. ‘So…have you ever slept with a prostitute?’. ‘Yeah’ he bluntly replied.

Very honest. I was shocked. I hadn’t actually had a man be so brutally and directly honest with me.

‘What? Really?! How many!?’… I enquired…with my mouth a little agape at this point.  ‘Oh loads. Probably hundreds.. when I was living in the middle east.. it was more like girls who hung around and it wasn’t like giving them money directly they just hung about and we’d give them cash to buy things. But I got Gonorrhoea and that freaked me out so I came back’.

Wow. I was a little taken aback. At the sheer honesty. Grateful though. However…my brain had just taken him out of my ‘potential’ compartment and swiftly put him in the ‘no go’ area.  Which was a shame. But ya know. But saying that – we were only friends though right? And maybe I’d got it all wrong and he wasn’t interested in me at all. We sat uncomfortably opposite each other…’I kinda wish I hadn’t told you that…’ he said.

A few weeks later I got the text. The booty call text… it was late…he was drunk…  ’wanna get a taxi to mine?’.

There’s open minded and then there’s.. open minded. Ya get me?

Oh Louis…Louis Louis Louis…oh dear…

ART NEWS: Date for the diary – Ben Oakley Gallery presents new works by David Bray and Mark Powell… 16th – 26th May

The Pen is front_2 (1)

MUSIC: Listen to CRYSTAL FIGHTERS ‘CAVE RAVE’ album sampler HERE which will be released on the 27th May:

FREE DOWNLOAD You & I (Gigamesh remix):

Have a good day. BeckiXx

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MUSIC NEWS: PJP, The Deer Tracks, Suns

Posted on April 11, 2013 by ohDearyme

‘If art sings of Gods, in their silence we must look to ourselves for answers.’ Suns

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Carne Griffiths

Right. I haven’t featured any music for a while. So what is on my stereo o o o ooooo. Well. Here are my highly recommended tracks for April. Setting up for the summer – which I’m predicting will be a scorcher.. for one day at least… here is ohDearyme’s music nuse. News. NeWs…

We’ve featured the Patrick James Pearson band on ohDearyme before and we’re huge fans! Which is why they are featuring again.. I’m happy to announce that they’ve been working on their debut album ‘And So It Goes’- due for release on the 3rd June. Here is their new track ‘Vicious Luck’ which will be released through Ouf Records:

FREE DOWNLOAD HERE

PJP Website

I am also enjoying The Deer Tracks..

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…who are Swedish super-duo David Lehnberg and Elin Lindfors. Due to release their album entitled ‘The Archer Trilogy PT.3′ on 27th May via The Control Group here is their upbeat dancey track entitled ‘Lazarus’. With eerie underlying dark tones to compliment they’re definitely ones to watch… FREE DOWNLOAD:

They will be performing in London in May. So get on that.

The Deer Tracks Website

I am very excited about this from Empire of the Sun.

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Who I get most of my style inspiration from… (me below)

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Is that an elf I can see…?

So if you ever need a triangle player guys. I’m sure I could learn..

And last not least! Suns! Hailing from East London and led by Michael Tyrrell..  I suspect that whilst currently still mainly on the underground scene it won’t be long before they make a sharp peak UP…

STYLE TIP: Triangles are in fashion this season. Anything will a triangle on it will get you in.

triangle

Which I’m happy about, because I’ve never really liked circles.

And lastly for all you artists out there get involved with this – set up by Carne Griffiths – an exhibition of artwork and objects from childhood in aid of great Ormond street hospital to be held as part of the Leytonstone Arts Trail – 6th & 7th of July at Norlington Road Studios Leyton E10 6LA- LINK

Get involved!

Enjoy,

Becki Bx

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VIDEO: Urban Barrier – London’s Largest Urban Art Show

Posted on March 15, 2013 by ohDearyme

Screen Shot 2013-03-15 at 16.48.17I was invited down to Urban Barrier – London’s Largest Urban Art Show curated by Ben Oakley.  Below is a video of just some of the amazing artists that had their work on display… including Fret, Rowan Newton, Carne Griffiths, Ben Oakley, Ray Richardson and Asbo Luv…

Thanks to Yunioshi for their track Tanlines which is out at the end of March – listen to more of them HERE

Buy the art work or get in touch with Mr Ben Oakley HERE

Have a good weekend…

Becki Bx

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Art: Städel Museum

Posted on April 30, 2013 by ohDearyme

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Anish Kapoor, Green Shadow 2011

With a press invite to the Städel Museum – one of the oldest and most renowned museums in Germany, I decided to leave the small ‘healing’ town of Bad Ems Germany and jumped on the train to Frankfurt changing at Koblenz. My experience of German spas, whilst certainly interesting  - I found to be more traumatising than relaxing:

“She is wearing her swimming costume! GET IT OFF!! GET IT OFF.. ” a hundred naked old people are stomping towards me.. the sauna is hot and the chants are getting stronger.. louder. I wake up. Time to make like a tree…..

The museum holds almost a complete overview of 700 years of European art history. And I assumed that I would find the contemporary section more appealing (none of that old boring history stuff). However, I found myself completely and totally absorbed in the Old Masters section. Perhaps it’s the stage of life that I’m in right now – but as I read about the ‘Ideal to Individuality’ stages of art I realized. Most artists of their time are under the illusion that whatever they do is revolutionary. Which quite rightly it could be! And actually competitiveness is nothing new. Artists such as Michelangelo, Raphael and Leonardo competed against each other to attain perfection and ‘ideal beauty’ in their work… always trying to surpass each other. And that was teh 15th Century.

As I headed from from the Old Masters down to the Contemporary section, I found myself wondering whether over the decades we might have lost something along the way. I wonder what the Michelangelo’s over the centuries might think of the current state of the art world. The increasing popularity of Banksy, X Factor, Tracy Emin, Vice Magazine, JLS….

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This is a picture of Narcissus at the Fountain, 1510. A man who fell in love with his unattainable image in the water and died of grief. The tale is where we derived the word Narcissist – excessive self love.

And so I left the museum. Perhaps a little more at ease. Comforted by the fact that revolutions, disease, disaster, pain, anger, love, control, happiness, temptation. Well. Its nothing new. And the world has survived. I suppose I’m just a little bit unsure as to where we’re at. I wonder. What will our era be defined as?

A really thought provoking museum with an excellent delivery of art – unassuming of one’s artistic background – I definitely recommend visiting the Städel, Frankurt.

Becki Bx

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TRAVEL: RYANAIR…

Posted on April 20, 2013 by ohDearyme

“Have enough courage to trust love one more time and always one more time.” Maya Angelou

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When my friend Anna Han told me she was at an artist residency in a castle in Germany mentally I was already there. ‘You must come and stay in this place! It is a healing town! And I know you need healing’ she teased via email. It has been two years since I have spent time with Anna. Having met in a small town called Cheongju, South Korea, East Side… the fact that she would be momentarily West Side. Well it’s one of those opportunities to see a friend that doesn’t happen all so often. So I booked my flight. Ryanair.. cheap and cheerful. I prepare to travel light, packing a small bag, deciding to wear the same thing on rotation and board the cheap and cheerful 15 pound flight.

On the plane, I take an aisle seat and find myself sitting next to a tall, white haired englishman. A professional golfer, fluent in both English and German it seems. We chat about music, culture, jobs…

‘There is no way to get to Bad Ems (destination) tonight’ the lady on the information desk tells me. (WTF I think to myself) ‘Oh no… really?’ I voice. ’No way… I’m sure that…’  ‘Everything ok Becki?’ a mans voice interrupts from behind me ’need me to translate?’ the theme tune Here I am to save the day! momentarily passes through my mind. It is the man from the plane. He steps in and takes over the conversation. He and the woman on the desk discuss transfers in German. The woman looks flustered and raises her hands quite a bit..’ok Becki.. you cannot get to Bad Ems by public transport tonight – I will drive you’ the man says. (For the purpose of this story I will name him – lets call him ‘Jeeves’)

‘OMG really?…there is no way to get there?!’ I look wide eyed at the woman on the information desk then back at my new friend Jeeves. She shakes her head ‘I am sorry’ she says in her thick German accent. FUCK. I look back at my rescuer – Jeeves… ‘Are you sure?’ I hesitate. ‘Er… Thank you so much!’ I look at the white marbley floor and consider sleeping on it for the night. Confusion arises at my friends directions.

We walk out on to the exit plain of Frankfurt Hahn airport and look out at the vast empty space. ‘Dead!’ Jeeves exclaims. Ryanair. Always a price to pay I think to myself. I weigh up my options. Jeeves gives me his business card. It looks cocha. So I get into the passenger side of the car and we begin the drive.

Half an hour in Jeeves (who I’m starting to wonder if he reads this blog will mind me calling him this for the purpose of the story) pulls over to a petrol station. To fill up and to ask directions. I sit and look at my phone signal. Dead. God damn it. Five minutes later another man gets in to the car with us. Jeeves and him are talking to each other in German. I’m confused. ‘This man works here – he’s going to tell us how to get onto the highway.. am a bit lost’ my new found friend exclaims ‘I will drop him at his house on the way’. We pull out of the petrol station and turn left onto a dark track… the bright lights of the highway fading away behind us as we begin to go down a small off the beat road surrounded by woodland. The film ‘Taken’ flashes through my mind. At this point.. I begin to think about my naivity and trust issues. I can feel my heartbeat gaining speed. This is it I think. I’m going to die. See how easy that was to be manipulated. But he seemed so normal. I am actually pretty scared. I ponder on voicing that fact. I decide to stay quiet. I start to think about the woman on the information desk and about the CCTV at the airport. This comforts me a little. Ten minutes later we pull out of the trees and back onto a main road. Jeeves stops and the other man gets out. He waves us goodbye. ‘Ahhh he’s taken us on a shortcut..’ he says….’I wonder how much you’re going to owe me for this Becki!’ he grins at me. He is joking. And unaware of my nervousness which I do my best not to show. For the comfort of us both. ’Actually I don’t usually get in to strangers cars…’ I utter back to him.. he looks at me a little shocked. ‘No no’ he say’s as he realises he has flustered me a little.

We pull up to the castle I will be staying at for the next week. The nice man driving me has taken two hours out of his way to get me here safe and sound. I am grateful for his kindness and act of chivalry.

‘You know it is so sad for Europeans’ Anna states to me… ‘I talk to most of my friends… and the major hindrance for them is the expense of transport. Young people cannot go and meet each other very often.. its so expensive to travel here in Europe compared to the East!’.

I think about my Ryanair experience. Whilst cheaper than getting an hour up the road in England.. there is usually a price to pay on the other side.

I am grateful to the man and his act of kindness.

I’m listening to Daniel James ‘The Stone and the Hollow’:

Becki Bx

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Human Rights Watch Film Festival: CAMP 14

Posted on March 29, 2013 by ohDearyme

A few years back I was living in South Korea. I was living alone in a city called Cheongju. Every Saturday and without warning a siren would radiate it’s shrill call throughout the small town. A test siren. And a dark reminder of the problems still prevalent with the North. I remember how I jumped the first time I heard it… my initial reaction being: OMG! WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING!! As I sat alone in my small bedsit studio..  I wondered if there was going to be an evacuation and my main worry was whether my boss at the English Campus I was teaching at would remember about me and would come and get me if needs be! But she never came… and when I saw that people were getting on with their daily grind.. my fear of invasion/evacuation/world war three dissipated. It was a situation that they had grown used to. And had simply forgotten to inform me of. Most of my learning about the North and South Korean divide came from the children I taught – who had a lot of empathy for their North Korean neighbours. Them and a young man called Kaka who was a researcher on North Korea at a university in Busan. When I received an invite to the Human Rights Watch Festival – I was drawn to go and view Camp 14 – Total Control Zone.

This film details the true story of a young man called Shin Dong-Huyk who was born into a prison camp called simply ‘Camp 14′ to political prisoners. Here Shin worked throughout his childhood oblivious to the world beyond the barbed wire fence. This film consists of interviews with a former camp guard, a member of the secret police and an interview detailing the memories of Shin Dong-Huyk himself – as a person born into and brought up in a world of destruction, abuse and control. Filmmaker Marc Wiese purposefully leaves in the long, uncomfortable silences of Shin’s testimony of his life within the camp – almost respectfully so. After all – this is a story that details a real life dystopian horror and it cannot be told in haste. This is a place where mind control and abuse is actually very real, very prevalent and happening not in the future.. but right now on Planet Earth. But Shin’s dramatic escape to ‘civilization’ details an unexpected and interesting take on how society in the modern world has trappings of it’s own. An incredibly brave and honest film.

For the film site click HERE

Another film I highly recommend is The Parade created by filmmaker Srdjan Dragojevic. This film is set in Serbia where gay men and lesbian women face extreme discrimination. It follows the problematic attempt of a group of people to hold a Gay Pride Parade in Belgrade.  This film is cleverly funny highlighting the importance of the issues involved without trivialising them. An excellent movie!

For more on the Human Rights Watch Film Festival who are doing an excellent job on raising awareness on very important human rights issues please visit HERE.. 

Becki Bx

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